My boss (P. 2)

Buy low; sell high- My Boss

Great advice for stocks, but now I have to take these words of wisdom and touch on what they mean to me. Make it a Karate Kid moment when the words that were obvious hid some hidden truth. My boss was a direct man but I like to think he’d be proud of the deeper wisdom I pulled from his words.

Blue and Yellow Graph on Stock Market Monitor

I was an investment. I broke tools and bent parts on tractors trying to do jobs for a man I viewed so highly. He saw something in me despite my knowledge being little and cost being great. He put the time in to watch his investment grow, and then he sold it to the world.

I wasn’t his only one. He knew a diverse portfolio was important. He sent us out in the world to become lawyers, accounts, consultants, and goat herders. Defending, enriching, informing, and nurturing those who come into contact with us. His greatest joy when we visited was discovering how we continued to grow. No longer needing his investing, but now investing in those around us.

Person Holding Pink Piggy Coin Bank

I often wonder how I was fortunate enough to come to meet my boss and stay in his employment. I think back to one of the first time I was working for him. He had left to go do something, and I had quickly finished what work I had. I stood a moment in the large three bay garage waiting for him when I saw leaves blow in. Noticing quite a few leaves had already made it in I grabbed a broom and began sweeping. He returned shortly. I looked up from sweeping. To see him smiling at me.

That’s showing initiative.

I didn’t even know what it meant at the time. Now I know it meant everything.

A day off

Long hours and slow minutes make for a mediocre day. You work your life away for a day off, but when it comes there is nothing to look forwards to. The games aren’t enough, the shows not adequate anymore, and the only company is the silence. A lonely ever coming silence. Your texts are left hanging. Conversations over before they have begun. Refreshing the page doesn’t give you anymore likes or love, but rather assurance that you are, without doubt, alone. You dream of a day off only to live the nightmare it brings. There is no joy in this loneliness.

Person Sitting on Bench Under Tree

Solitude. Stifling solitude. Strangling, suffocating solitude.  Shocking, startling, savage solitude. The walls begin to close and the noise of the outside world is a distant thing that you want to be a part of, but people scare you. You scares you. When did making conversation become pointless, and companionship taxing. Has living a life always been this hard? Have thoughts always been this heavy?

Man Lying on Rubber Mat Near Barbell Inside the Gym

Give it a rest. No one is listening. You’re just talking to yourself again and the argument is always the same. You can see the future. The one you desire in your mind. The person you want to be, but we know it’s a lie. A truth without truth. A wish of who you are, but who you will never be. Just sit there. Unsatisfied and unhappy waiting for something. Thinking of someone. Hoping for dramatic change. Soon work will be here again, and the desire for a day off will be back. The loneliness to follow.

If we are meant to struggle alone; we will do it together. – The companion within

Blue Eyed Man Staring at the Mirror